The Plan.

For those of you who keep up with me on social media or read my blogs on the regular all know my birth plan.
You know, the one where I went all natural with no pain medications and no interventions whatsoever? Yeah, that one.
Well, for those of you interested…here is my birth story. 
Tuesday- I went to my 40 week 5 day doctors appointment. My body has made some minor progress the past 3 weeks. Which made me happy. I told myself any progress was progress I wouldn’t have to make in labor. My midwife stripped my membranes which led to instant cramping. I didn’t get excited because I didn’t want to feel let down. I went home and matt had picked up Allie from school. I let him know I was cramping but nothing consistent and not to get too excited. We sat down to watch tv and the cramps because more intense and eventually I broke out my contraction timer. They were for sure contractions. They were 40 seconds long and 2 minutes apart. My midwife had told me to go to the hospital at 5 minutes apart because of how far from the hospital we were. We got the car packed up, called family, and were on our way. 

We got into labor and delivery where they put us in a monitoring room. They hooked me up and watched babies heart rate and also, the contractions I was indeed having. They were coming extremely consistently and pretty strong too. They checked me and I hadn’t had much progress since that morning at my doctors appointment. I had a tiny progress but nothing much. They had me walk the floor for 30 minutes, check baby for 10 and repeat that 3 times to see if it would make any more progress. So off we went. Matt and I walked and walked and walked. 

After walking they checked me, nothing. The nurse went to speak with my midwife and she decided they didn’t want to send me home since I was about to be 41 weeks and that raises some risks, so they wanted to watch me over night. 

We got put into our room and relaxed for the rest of the night. As we were walking to our room our nurse mentioned they would start pitocin early the next morning. I got a littl irritated with her. She knew I wanted natural. She knew my birth plan I had sent into the hospital months ago. She had been told these things. So why in the world is she saying that death word?! I quickly told her I would avoid induction at all costs. She said she would talk to the midwife and that was the last of that for ththe night. As the night went on my contractions lessened and became less intense. This was extremely frustrating. 
Wednesday- I woke up to having a few short contractions. Nothing consistent and nothing intense. I had gone from a 2 to a 3cm overnight. At least it was something. My nurse said she talked to the midwife and that she said they would have me walk for 30 mins, monitor for 10, walk for an hour, and have me bounce on my birthing ball and then check to see what progress I had made. I did the walking and I did the birth ball. She said as long as I was making SOME kind of progress they would keep me there. If not…my options were to go home, get induced, or break my water. All options I just rolled my eyes at. I just knew my body was going to go for it after I walked. She checked me after everything and there was no progress. 
I knew at this point I would have to make a decision. It was one that was extremely hard. There was zero pressure from the nurses and my midwife. No pressure at all. I prayed about it and talked with my husband over it and all the options. Every option came along with some kind of risk. We picked the option which we thought was best, pitocin.
I wanted to cry. And I died a little on the inside. My perfect plan was being completely stomped on. Nothint was going as I wished it would. Funny how that works right? 
We started pitocin about 10am on Wednesday.  I decided I was going to go as long as possible naturally laboring through the pitocin. The contractions took a little while to kick in. Once they did though, they were intense right away. For a while my birth ball was enough. I would bounce on it and it would distract me from the contraction. I had an IV in and had to be monitored so I couldn’t do the walking I had wanted to. That was also disappointing. 
As the contractions came harder, longer, and closer together…I felt rough. And so was Caroline. With each contraction her heart rate would drop. It would go up then drop again. The nurse said they were watching her closely because her head was getting squeezed so tightly from the contractions. That in itself was terrifying. They watched that through most of my labor but it stayed consistent and then got somewhat better. The contractions were lasting over a minute with a minute break(sometimes less) in between them. I could no longer speak through them and I couldn’t concentrate on any conversation around me. I decided to get off the birth ball and sit up really straight in bed. 
My wonderful husband put pressure on my feet and offered lots of encouraging words. 
I then decided to try the medicine in my IV. That had helped relax me and let me sleep through most of my labor with my first daughter. The labor I was having was all back labor. Which let me tell you…is so dramatically different than labor in the front! At least for me it was. All I can say is it felt like someone was snapping my back in half through every contraction. And the pain was hanging around on the short “breaks” I was getting between contractions. 
I requested the medicine in the IV. They put it in and it worked for all of 2 minutes. Made me feel extremely sleepy and got me through like 2 contractions. Then, they became more intense and I thought I was going to die. I was now crying out in pain and trying my best to stay calm. I did good at staying calm but I wanted to lay on the floor and cry like a baby. Ha.
I then decided to get the epidural. I wanted to relax and I wanted to breathe. I wanted to just feel like I wasn’t about to die. It took what felt like years to get it put in my back. I was begging for someone to just make them stop(ha ha..yes I was saying that out loud). 
We got the epidural in and I laid down and got to relax. I got labor shakes so badly from the pain before th epidural. It was horrible. 
They came back and checked me and I was now at 4cm. They broke my water because it had started to leak and I had my bloody show. 
Not too much longer and she checked me again. This time I was 8cm. They started getting everything ready for delivery and I was SO EXCITED and relieved the end was in sight. I could relax once my baby was safe in my arms. 
Then, the nurse came in and started flipping me from side to side because babies heart rate shot way up and was staying up. She took my temperature and I was running a fever. She flipped me again and gave me an oxygen mask. She even through out the c section word. She talked to my midwife and my midwife said we are doing everything normal but that I needed antibiotics before they would check me again. 

She got my antibiotics going and propped my leg up in this thing. It brought babies heart rate back down. She told me to try and get a nap in before I had to birth this baby. And to let her know if I felt pressure to push. 
I closed my eyes and right as I was about asleep my eyes shot open. A burst of pressure and the need to push. We called the nurse. She came in and my antibiotics were almost gone so she checked me. 10cm dilated. She asked how long it took me to push my first out and I said 15 minutes. She got her phone ready to bring my midwife in. 
4 pushes and 10 minutes later Caroline was brought into the world at 5:16pm weighing 6lbs 14oz and 20 inches long.
I wasn’t and am not disappointed in myself for the way things went. Did I want a natural birth? Hell yeah. Was I upset when it didn’t go my way? At first I was truly devastated. 
I however felt no defeat during labor or delivery. And I feel so empowered after birth. My nurses were so impressed with how fast my body was bouncing back. Even just the few days of staying at the hospital. One nurse even guessed I had stayed fit during pregnancy because of how it all went. 
I’m thankful both me and Caroline are happy and healthy. And I am so thankful for my amazing husband who guided me through labor and encouraged me every step of the way. He lifted me up and let me know how strong I was. 
It was amazing. Birth is truly amazing. Our bodies are incredible. And I was reminded Gods plan isn’t the same as mine. I was reminded that nothing goes as planned. I was humbled through it. And I am so proud of myself for bringing this baby here. 
Thanks for reading,

Lex 

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LifeAsLex

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