In this moment…

Today is a day of reflection.
  
  

It’s a day of life and death.
It’s a day of celebration and a day to mourn. It’s a day of friends and family. 
As I’m sitting in my car with all the windows down and the sun on my face.. I take a deep breath in and let it all out. I’m so blessed to be here.
I’m so blessed to be alive. 

I’m no where near where I thought I would be in my life. And that is okay.
So many previous souls never get to experience life in the way I have. 

They never made it to learn life’s hard lessons.
And I never know when I may take my last breath. 
When you look at life in that way…I don’t believe you can have an unhappy life. It’s too short. It’s too short to be upset over plain red cups, bad hair cuts, and body weight. 
When you learn to stop and take life in and truly be grateful for your soul. Your beautiful and gorgeous soul. You realize no matter you circumstances that you are beyond blessed.
You are breathing. You have opportunity. You have life! Life is fragile. 
Our bodies are drivin by our beating hearts. Which at any moment can stop. They can stop beating. In a moment everything can change.
So, reflect, enjoy, love, laugh, and just be. 
I have a war inside myself. I have a part of me being positive and peaceful…and the other parts of me are anxious and depressed.
I’m not sure how this works. I haven’t completely found out how to deal with it. But, that’s just it. This is how I am. I’m part fire and part ice. I’m happy, yet sad. I’m calm but there is a storm. 
Maybe I am a little crazy. Maybe I have issues. I know this. I won’t deny it.
But despite the war inside my body and mind, I’m thankful. I’m grateful. I’m learning to find peace among the spots of no peace. I’m learning to create happy…to create peace. 
To be the light where there seems to be none. To shine brighter than the sun. I will create sunshine in the night. I will find peace where it seems to be gone.
Today, I’m remember such a short life. I’m remembering the ache in the heart of my best friend. I’m remembering the ache in my own heart as I watched her suffer from the inside out. 
But! I am also remember the joy and the lessons that that little baby has taught so many of us. I’m rejoicing in the growth of my best friend. I’m rejoicing in the birthday of my friend which is tomorrow. I’m thanking the Lord that I have her and her sweet soul.
Today I am breathing in extra deep and bringing peace into my soul. Because life is too great and too short to do anything less. 
This post is dedicated to Corbin. Rest in heaven sweet angel baby. I will take care of your mommy the best I can. And I will bring peace for your memory. 

Thanks for reading,
Lex

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LifeAsLex

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